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Mar 14

I am 9! sez YELC collectively

Not so long ago, on the evening of *strategically trails off incoherently, so as to avoid revealing the date and thus the once again sizable gap between blog posts* the Yonge Eglinton Laser Eye and Cosmetic Centre in Toronto, Ontario celebrated its ninth anniversary. Dr. David Rootman, who tempers his medical directorship with a side-gig as the main designer and sole proprietor of local coffee mug emporium Cuppa Dave!, was well aware that ninth anniversaries necessitate the bestowal of pottery on loved ones. Thus all YELC employees received the ingeniously crafted and suggestively interlocking personalized coffee mug set pictured below.

Romantic coffee mugs with heart-shaped handles: not in the least bit tasteless!

That no-one working at YELC is named Jennifer or Michael was no great hindrance to our appreciation, nor was the fact that our celebratory dinner that evening consisted entirely of nine weird, garlicky snails with a birthday candle stuck in each. Wed like to thank Mr. Slimetrails Escar-A-Go-Go for a lovely evening out.

Yes, as I lean back in my less-than-comfortable office chair the moted mid-afternoon light falling through the nearby window becomes a golden path of remembrance. Oh what a crazy, wonderful time these last nine years have been, even though I wasnt working here for most of them. I remember when Dr. Rootman was a mere scraggly-haired roadie in charge of the laser show for noted all-corneal-specialist Pink Floyd tribute act, ShEYEne On You Crazy DEYEmond. The good doctor still chokes up slightly when recalling the moment he decided to devote his life to medicine: a ragamuffin much like the ones we encountered previously had gained admittance to a concert in Bismarck, North Dakota. He stumbled around the audience, his vision so obviously poor that the Roger Waters and David Gilmour stand-ins rocking the stage to the best of their proggy abilities must have appeared to have been faint blobs. Then, at roughly the halfway mark of Echoes, serendipity produced a miracle in disasters clothing when a stray laser accidentally struck the ragamuffin in the eyes! But after a moment or two, he rubbed his eyes, rushed the stage, clambered atop the giant model prism situated behind the drummer and with arms outstretched bellowinglyproclaimed Behold! I can see!* The band proceeded to play various mariachi numbers in celebration rather than the self-pitying, boring entirety of The Wall as originally planned.

Realizing the true power of lasers, and that his Bachelors Degree in Roadie Studies had been a complete waste of time, the then yet-to-be-Dr. Rootman enrolled in medical school and eventually became the greatest corneal specialist the world has ever known.

So Happy 9th Anniversary YELC! Heres hoping we stick around for another 900, giving the gift of clear eyesight to ragamuffin and non-ragamuffin alike.

ShEYEne On You Crazy DEYEmond at the culmination of their recent performance in Stonewall, Manitoba

* This is not a recommended means of doing laser eye surgery.

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